Category Archives: Biograhies/Memoirs

Feb18

2 Memoirs-One from Someone Who Escaped a Cult and Another Who Part of a New Culture: Real Housewives of BH

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Product Details

  • Print Length: 416 pages
  • Publisher: William Morrow (February 5, 2013)
  • Sold by: HarperCollins Publishers

Synopsis:

Jenna Miscavige Hill, niece of Church of Scientology leader David Miscavige, was raised as a Scientologist but left the controversial religion in 2005. In Beyond Belief, she shares her true story of life inside the upper ranks of the sect, details her experiences as a member Sea Org—the church’s highest ministry, speaks of her “disconnection” from family outside of the organization, and tells the story of her ultimate escape.
In this tell-all memoir, complete with family photographs from her time in the Church, Jenna Miscavige Hill, a prominent critic of Scientology who now helps others leave the organization, offers an insider’s profile of the beliefs, rituals, and secrets of the religion that has captured the fascination of millions, including some of Hollywood’s brightest stars such as Tom Cruise and John Travolta.

My Review: 
Wow!  This book is detailed into the life of Jenna Miscavige Hill, niece to David Miscaige (CBO).  Jenna is so brave as she delves into the darkest and most corrupt system that claims to be a church.  It is harrowing to read that at the age of 2 she was raised at a camp of sorts for children, whose parents had dedicated their lives to the Sea Org.  With Jenna’s parents away, somewhere within the organization, Jenna is indoctrinated into the beliefs and different levels within Scientology.  There are so many moments that Jenna truly wants to embrace the lifestyle and sacrifice she has made as a Sea Org member (signing the billion year contract), however she soon can’t ignore or excuse the red flags that keep popping up.  Over time, Jenna loses family members who are classified as “SP’s”, and she is alone with only the guidance of her Aunt Shelley and a few other higher-ups.  However, there comes a point where Jenna truly wants her life, her independence, and sees the organization’s corruptions, abuse of power, and leaves the organization.
There were many times I was just shocked by the depravity and isolation Jenna and others like her, experienced.  Scientology isn’t a religion, it’s a way to gain higher power based on the money you give and who you are (star power).  The sheer torture of working non-stop for little to no pay, the separation from family and friends, the cut-offs from those who dont’ support Scientology, and the paranoia surrounded by those in higher ups who fear that the organization’s image will be tarnished, motivates those in upper positions to abuse their power, demote people from their level, and really becomes more man based than God based.  While Scientology doesn’t believe in God, they really look to LRH as the man with the plan.  With some basic psychology 101 and e-meter readings, individuals are coerced through fear, removal of benefits ( like making a phone call), and falling behind a level (even if you already reached a level, you can possibly be stripped of it to start all over).  Education is primarily centered around the teachings and not formal education (traditional schooling).  So, there is a catch.  If a person moves through all the levels, which costs thousands of dollars, by the time the highest level is reached to Clear-the person may feel rather stupid learning about the aliens and Xenu that they stick with it b/c of all the money invested.  Likewise, with education-if a child is raised in Scientology, he/she will be behind educationally and may not feel useful in the outside world.  So, in many ways this religion does cause a sense of learned helplessness and a person becomes dependent on someone in higher position to be validated.  With so many secrets and trying to keep people in control, those in the Sea Org don’t want tv, interact too much with the outside world, and become truly dependent on the organization.
Reading all the Jenna endured, I am amazed and inspired by her courage, tenacity, and willingness to ask questions-even when others didn’t want her to.  Jenna brought great points to the forefront and one can only hope that people will look more deeper into the secrets and abuse that Scientology has done to its members.
Overall, this was an incredible read and Jenna wrote this book in terms that non-Scientologists could understand, but that Scientologists would also understand and know that her experience is true.  I hope that her book opens eyes and creates changes within the organization and the individuals that make up the “religion”.
4-cupcake1

Product Details

  • Print Length: 258 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 1476707626
  • Publisher: Gallery Books (February 12, 2013)
  • Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc
Synopsis:
She’s the brutally honest breath of fresh air on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, known for her dramatic divorce, her barely-there clothing, and her inability to keep her mouth shut. So why should she change now? Brandi Glanville tells all in this hilarious, no-holds-barred memoir.Fans have been waiting for Brandi’s scoop on one of the biggest divorces of the decade, since her husband of eight years abandoned her and their two sons to marry country singer LeAnn Rimes. Not only does Brandi spill the beans about her side of the split, the lovable housewife shares the incredible wild ride that took her from a life in the ghetto to Hollywood’s most elite circles. For the first time, Brandi talks about how she escaped a rough neighborhood on the outskirts of Sacramento and stumbled into a successful modeling career that swept her into a world of Paris Fashion Weeks, private jets, and uncircumcised penises. Before she knew it, Brandi was the perfect Hollywood trophy wife—at least until her marriage exploded.Today, the refreshingly filter-free housewife and unapologetic mom is the newest full-time cast member of Bravo’s juggernaut franchise, where she often elicits raised eyebrows and gossip from her costars for her refusal to be the scorned ex-wife, to be bullied, to change her sarcastic sense of humor, or—on most occasions—to wear a bra. Sassy, raunchy, and compulsively readable, Drinking and Tweeting perfectly captures Brandi’s open-book attitude, as she dishes about everything from her DUI, her cheating ex, her one-night stands, and the secret plastic surgery that made her “seventeen” again. You’re sure to enjoy every page of this funny, upbeat, honest tale. Clear your schedule for an afternoon and grab your favorite cocktail, a comfy seat . . . and maybe a Xanax. But that’s for later.
My Review:I love Brandi’s crude sense of humor and she is so smart.  So, put together beauty, talent, smart, and wit, and mix it with an ugly divorce, and you’ve got this great book.  Brandi is quite honest and very brutal at times.  There were moments I cringed, but just as quickly, her wit shines through.  If anyone reads this book, they will forever remember these two words: Vaginal Rejuvenation.  Her ex lost some jobs, got a woman that is trying to morph into his Brandi, and Brandi got a new vjayjay and a book!  Love that.  While she is quite honest about the heartache, postpartum depression, anxiety attacks, and life rebuilding, I would have loved more detail on how she overcame PPD and about her post divorce.  She has admitted that this book was written shortly after her divorce, so her emotions were raw and she was filled with anger, however it would be better had she added some chapters on her “happily ever after”.  It would have also been so much more personal had she included some photos of her early modeling years, her married life, and her life post divorce. All in all, this is a great book and one that many will enjoy, especially if you love RHOBH like me!4 rating
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Aug21

Review: Solo: A Memoir of Hope by Hope Solo

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Product Details

  • File Size: 1566 KB
  • Print Length: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Harper (August 14, 2012)
  • Sold by: HarperCollins Publishers
  • ASIN: B007BCG9N2
  • Genre:  Memoir

Synopsis:

“My family doesn’t do happy endings. We do sad endings or frustrating endings or no endings at all. We are hardwired to expect the next interruption or disappearance or broken promise.”

Hope Solo is the face of the modern female athlete. She is fearless, outspoken, and the best in the world at what she does: protecting the goal of the U.S. women’s soccer team. Her outsized talent has led her to the pinnacle of her sport—the Olympics and the World Cup—and made her into an international celebrity who is just as likely to appear on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars as she is on the covers of Sports Illustrated, ESPN The Magazine, and Vogue. But her journey—which began in Richland, Washington, where she was raised by her strong-willed mother on the scorched earth of defunct nuclear testing sites—is similarly haunted by the fallout of her family history. Her father, a philanderer and con man, was convicted of embezzlement when Solo was an infant. She lost touch with him as he drifted out of prison and into homelessness. By the time they reunited, years later, in the parking lot of a grocery store, she was an All-American goalkeeper at the University of Washington and already a budding prospect for the U.S. national team. He was living in the woods.

Despite harboring serious doubts even about the provenance of her father’s last name (and her own), Solo embraces him as fiercely as she pursues her dreams of being a world-class soccer player. When those dreams are threatened by her standing within the national team, as when she was famously benched in the semifinals of the 2007 World Cup after four shutouts and spoke her piece publicly, we see a woman of uncompromising independence and hard-won perseverance navigate the petty backlash against her. For the first time, she tells her version of that controversial episode, and offers with it a full understanding of her hard-scrabble life.

Moving, sometimes shocking, Solo is a portrait of an athlete finding redemption. This is the Hope Solo whom few have ever glimpsed.

My Review:

This is a book that shares very intimate details of the struggles Hope experiences from childhood through adulthood.  I must admit that not being an avid soccer fan, I had never heard of Hope Solo before Dancing with the Stars.  When I saw how Hope was portrayed on the show as very defensive to criticism, it just seemed in stark contrast to the jovial look I saw on her face when the soccer team for TEAM USA won gold.  This is why I purchased her memoir. I wanted to know what was underneath all the costumes, whether soccer or dance, and learn more about her.

Hope Solo’s memoir bares it all on the floor for you to see. She shares every triumph, challenge, and personal journey through it all.  As I was reading the book, I not only learned more about her, but also about the sport of soccer.  It was amazing to see the hurdles she had to literally jump, the criticism she had to take from the national team under Greg Ryan‘s leadership, and how a woman must still break barriers to be successful.

Contrary to the media and all the hype her book has received for “throwing ‘so-and-so’ under the bus”, this is about Hope’s journey…nothing else.  There is no hidden agenda in this book, she isn’t trying to make anyone out to be the “bad guy”, nor is she trying to justify her own actions.  She is who she is and she gives it all to her readers….take it or leave it, you will walk away with a better understanding of the person behind the accomplishments and criticisms that come with it.

I walked away from this book with so much respect and admiration for a young woman who defied what critics had said, what statistics said based on her family issues and where she lived, and what others in her sport had expected her to be.  Hope is not a “solo” act. She depended on her family for emotional strength and on her body for physical strength.  She depended on her team to do their job and wanted them to know they could depend on her.  Hope lives in a man’s world of sports, but through her sport and experience, she has allowed other young dreamers to follow in her place.  The goalie position, known as the unpopular place soccer players want to be….Hope made it the place that demanded respect and deserved it.

She may come across as tough, uncaring, and she is when she needs to be.  However, she is also very sensitive and loves to laugh, be with those who enjoy life, and who know that she is more than a soccer player…she is a woman with heart and passion.  This is a book I highly recommend for anyone who wants to be inspired, who has been told “no” one to many times, and who obviously loves soccer.  However, more than that, this is book that deserves to be read because it’s got pure heart and she holds nothing back.

Meaningful quotes that I loved:

” ‘Hope is, by definition, defiant.  It is only when everything is hopeless that hope begins to be a strength.’ ” (p. 31)

“….my goalkeeper coach, Amy, handed me a note that said, ‘A goalkeeper cannot win a game.  A goalkeeper saves it.’ “  (p. 95)

“Only a daughter cries like that for her father.’ ” (p.124)

“Out on the field, I put my right hand over my heart for the national anthem and held my left glove carefully by my side.  When I walked into the goal, I made the sign of the cross, kissed my closed fist, then opened my glove and let the ashes drop, saying a little prayer to myself.” (p.141)

“I was far beyond caring who judged how I celebrated something I had worked for my entire life.  Never again would I worry about what others thought.”  (p.184)

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Jun19

Review: Off Balance by Dominique Moceanu

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Product Details

  • File Size: 4394 KB
  • Print Length: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Touchstone (June 12, 2012)
  • Sold by: Simon and Schuster Digital Sales Inc
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0061Q13V2
  • Genre:  Memoir

Synopsis:

AT FOURTEEN YEARS OLD, Dominique Moceanu was the youngest member of the 1996 U.S. Women’s Olympic Gymnastics team, the first and only American women’s team to take gold at the Olympics. Her pixyish appearance and ferocious competitive drive quickly earned her the status of media darling. But behind the fame, the flawless floor routines, and the million-dollar smile, her life was a series of challenges and hardships.

Off Balance vividly delineates each of the dominating characters who contributed to Moceanu’s rise to the top, from her stubborn father and long-suffering mother to her mercurial coach, Bela Karolyi. Here, Moceanu finally shares the haunting stories of competition, her years of hiding injuries and pain out of fear of retribution from her coaches, and how she hit rock bottom after a public battle with her parents.

But medals, murder plots, drugs, and daring escapes aside (all of which figure into Moceanu’s incredible journey), the most unique aspect of her life is the family secret that Moceanu discovers, opening a new and unexpected chapter in her adult life. A mysterious letter from a stranger reveals that she has a second sister—born with a physical disability and given away at birth—who has nonetheless followed in Moceanu’s footsteps in an astonishing way.

A multilayered memoir that transcends the world of sports, Off Balance will touch anyone who has ever dared to dream of a better life.

My Review:

I absolutely loved this memoir!! Everyone remembers the petite size gymnast bringing the house down with her floor exercises at the 1996 Olympics, dancing to “Devil Went Down to Georgia”.  However, to read about the dark secrets and her struggles that went behind closed doors is so daunting and traumatic for any child to experience.  We’ve all seen the news reports and watched the interviews about her long lost sister, Jennifer, which certainly added another whole element to the book.  However, you haven’t seen it or heard it all from those medial outlets, so you have to read this book!

In her memoir, Dominique really pours her innermost thoughts, fears, and questions about discovering she has a sister and what that meant for her (lost dreams of having a big family, family secrets, acceptance).  She also writes very openly about the traditional Romanian family she lived in and how that also added to some of the abuse she experienced while training as a gymnast.

While there have been gymnasts trying to dismiss some of Dominique’s claims to the darkness and lack of support that goes on behind closed gymnasium doors, no one can take away from her own experiences.  As a licensed marriage and family therapist, it is quite common for family members to express different opinions and have completely different experiences to the same situation.

So, no one can dismiss Dominique as she paints a very real and vivid picture into the struggles she endured, how she overcame them, and what she is doing now to help future gymnasts.  This is her story, her voice, her struggles and triumphs, and I truly appreciated her authenticity and genuineness in writing this memoir.

I highly recommend this book for anyone that enjoys reading memoirs, enjoys the sport of the gymnastics and the Olympics, as well as those who like reading about family structures and roles within each family.

Connect with the Author

Website

Twitter

Facebook

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Jun19

Aloha from Hawaii!

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My family and I went to Maui for 10 gorgeous days!  It is everything people say it is: mesmerizing, calming, gorgeous, breathtaking, and the list can go on.  Being on the plane for 8 hours allowed me to read quite a bit!!  En route to Hawaii, I read a really great and easy book:

It was a free book that I had downloaded onto my Nook a while back, but decided to read it.  Having made the decision to be pro-active about my health and lose weight, I thought it was a perfect book to get started.  Aside from discussing weight issues and her time on The Biggest Loser, Michelle shares her struggles with rejection and deeper rooted issues that impacted her choices and lifestyle. I was truly in awe of her courage to face those issues and even more appreciative that she chose to be so open about it in her memoir.  I’d definitely encourage anyone that struggles with weight issues, is at a plateau in their weight, and/or wants to learn more about the journey of a contestant on The Biggest Loser, I suggest you read this book!

After reading this book and landed in Hawaii, I had to take a break from reading. It was gorgeous!!

Isn’t the water just gorgeous?? We were on a dinner cruise and saw the sunset, which was also spectacular!

This is the beach we went to all the time!!! It was so peaceful there and next to us were these huge lava rocks with mini caves underneath…the perfect place to climb and play.  The sand was so clean and pure, so we just loved playing there. Of course, I lounged and read books!! :D

I loved the people there, too! It felt like the most safest place to be and we loved every moment.  We met wonderful Islanders, spoke to people who had up and left their homes to move to Hawaii, and talked to business owners about how they have managed there.  Yes, I’d love to move there, too!!  Their tap water was AMAZING!!! Seriously.  It tasted like Fiji Water without the expense.  I only drank tap water because of how delicious it tasted.  My daughter left her Nike sandals on the beach and someone was kind enough to put them to the side of the walk way and there they stayed the whole day!!!  People were just so kind and we met some wonderful people….I just can’t speak highly enough of that place.  The prices are high, so you just can’t go with love in your heart and no money in your wallet ;)   BUT…it was sooo worth it!  We hope to visit again next year!

We drove up this mountain to watch the sunrise. It was spectacular!!

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Nov8

Crazy Book Tours: “Holy Ghost Girl” by Donna M. Johnson

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Synopsis:  

Donna Johnson was three years old when her mother signed on as the organist for Brother David Terrell, a hugely popular apocalyptic tent preacher during the 1960s and 70s. As a member of Brother Terrell’s inner circle Donna had a front row seat for the miracles, exorcisms, KKK face-offs and betrayals of the flesh that were common under the tent. As the faithful followed their prophet to backwaters across the South to await the end time, Donna left the ministry for good at age seventeen.

Recounted with deadpan observation and surreal detail, Holy Ghost Girl bypasses easy judgment to articulate a rich world where the mystery of faith and human frailty share a surprising and humorous coexistence.


Product Details

  • Hardcover: 278 pages
  • Publisher: Gotham (October 13, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1592406300
  • ISBN-13: 978-1592406302

My Review:

I love memoirs, especially ones based on a child’s experience, written by the child turned adult.  The reason for this is because I often wonder when things happen and adults are talking and writing about their experiences, what happens to the child?  What is he/she thinking? How is she/he coping?  Where’s her/his voice?

Donna Johnson’s book, titled “The Holy Ghost Girl” gives a window to those who always wonder what happens at big tent revivals and healing services.  Most importantly, it sheds light into what happens when the people go home.  Donna’s experience is one not so different from those who grew up in the charasmatic churches of the South or went to the tent revials in small Southern towns…at least from my own personal experience.  However, it is still mind boggling how someone ( a leader) can call himself that and lead people into believing he is God, or at least God’s right hand.  As a Christian, I believe that the Holy Bible is the Truth and is infallible, however it can certainly get twisted when interpreted and taught for one’s own purpose.

Donna is very open in her journey, what she witnessed, how it impacted her life as a child, and how she came to understand what it all meant to her (as a spectator looking in).  This is a great read, one that should be read, and one that should be used as a tool to heed caution.  While we all want to be closer to God, sometimes the road to getting there can be the wrong way, but how do we know?  Donna shows this through examples of those who handed over their money to their leader, gave up everything they knew to follow him, and sacrificed who they were to have the “experience”.  Falling down, crying, screaming, being healed and being caught up in wanting to be healed not only changed the lives of those who had the experience, but those who witnessed it, too.  Reading this book, it’s easy to think, “how could these people follow this man?  Could it even happen today?”These are people who gave everything to be closer to God, to David, and to be followers of their faith.  Some did experience instant healing, while others felt they just needed to wait a little longer for their miracle to manifest…they just needed to pray harder, fast more, tithe more, etc.  We see them in our news today, we’ve heard of them (think Jim Jones or the Davidians), we even have people in our daily walks try to talk to us about how their religion is the one true religion and without it, we will go to hell.

I am thankful to have read this book and hope that Donna finds healing by sharing such raw and intimate moments with her readers to learn and hopefully realize that our children are our future and they should be heard.  I also hope that somewhere in all of this, she does realize that God (with the capital G) does exist, loves her, and condones those who abuse His word.

Side Note:

After reading this book, I began doing searches and found some blog entries that Donna Johnson submitted on Psychology Today. Psychology Today is a reputable online site that lists therapists available and the kinds of services they provide.  I was intrigued by her blog entries and it really gave another dimension to who the author is.  The book focuses mainly on her childhood and how it impacted her growing up, and the blog entries are highlights of how spirituality has shaped her and is a great teaching tool for others.

Finding Spirituality in That Old Time Religion

Becoming Woody Allen

Making a Case for God with a Little G

*This book was provided through Crazy Book Tours as part of a virtual blog tour.  No money or other forms of compensation were given.

Follow the Tour!

10/28/2011  –  Phantom Paragrapher
10/29/2011  –  Deco My Heart
10/30/2011  –  Laurie Here
10/31/2011  –  Colloquium
11/1/2011  –  Tiffany’s Bookshelf
11/2/2011  –  Practical Frugality
11/7/2011  –  WV Stitcher
11/9/2011  –  Books in the Burbs
11/10/2011  –  StephTheBookworm
11/11/2011  –  Hippies, Beauty, and Books OH MY!

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Jul14

Review: A Stolen Life: A Memoir by Jaycee Dugard

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Synopsis:

In the summer of 1991 I was a normal kid. I did normal things. I had friends and a mother who loved me. I was just like you. Until the day my life was stolen.

For eighteen years I was a prisoner. I was an object for someone to use and abuse.

For eighteen years I was not allowed to speak my own name. I became a mother and was forced to be a sister. For eighteen years I survived an impossible situation.

On August 26, 2009, I took my name back. My name is Jaycee Lee Dugard. I don’t think of myself as a victim. I survived.

A Stolen Life is my story—in my own words, in my own way, exactly as I remember it.

—

The pine cone is a symbol that represents the seed of a new beginning for me. To help facilitate new beginnings, with the support of animal-assisted therapy, the J A Y C Foundation provides support and services for the timely treatment of families recovering from abduction and the aftermath of traumatic experiences—families like my own who need to learn how to heal. In addition, the J A Y C Foundation hopes to facilitate awareness in schools about the important need to care for one another.

Our motto is “Just Ask Yourself to . . . Care!”

A portion of my proceeds from this memoir will be donated to The J A Y C Foundation Inc.

http://www.thejaycfoundation.org

My Review:

This is Jaycee’s story, in her words, as she recounts the moments leading up to her abduction and the 18 years she was held captive.  Her story is raw with intimate details about the sexual and psychological abuse she endured by the two people who kidnapped her.  I won’t say who they are because they don’t deserve any recognition for the pain and suffering Jaycee experienced.  In her memoir, Jaycee includes journal entries she kept regarding her cat, Eclipse, and her own personal entries about her dreams, her goals, and her longing to see her mother again.

Jaycee Dugard has slowly worked on rebuilding her life and transitioning into society with her daughters.  While she wants to keep her children’s names and pictures out of the public life, she does write about her pregnancies with them and her relationship with them as mom and later as sister (which her captors wanted her to be regarded as).  Her story was very difficult to read as she describes her first days being handcuffed and sequestered to a small room with locks.  When she was found, she had been living in a tent and using a hole she made to pee.  With a 5th grade education, she homeschooled her daughters, who are her saving grace. Despite the fact that her captor is their father, she loves them without any boundaries.  She loves them freely and has the same dreams for them that she has for herself: to be free.

Jaycee’s strength and hope shines through despite everything she has experienced.  I highly recommend this book and encourage you to also visit The JAYC Foundation, Inc. or on Facebook.  In her memoir, she describes the significance to pine cones and monies received for her jewelry goes to her foundation to help children and families impacted by abduction.

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Jul4

Review: History of a Suicide: My Sister’s Unfinished Life by Jill Bialosky

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Synopsis:

“It is so nice to be happy. It always gives me a good feeling to see other people happy. . . . It is so easy to achieve.” —Kim’s journal entry, May 3, 1988

On the night of April 15, 1990, Jill Bialosky’s twenty-one-year-old sister Kim came home from a bar in downtown Cleveland. She argued with her boyfriend on the phone. Then she took her mother’s car keys, went into the garage, closed the garage door. She climbed into the car, turned on the ignition, and fell asleep. Her body was found the next morning by the neighborhood boy her mother hired to cut the grass.

Those are the simple facts, but the act of suicide is anything but simple. For twenty years, Bialosky has lived with the grief, guilt, questions, and confusion unleashed by Kim’s suicide. Now, in a remarkable work of literary nonfiction, she re-creates with unsparing honesty her sister’s inner life, the events and emotions that led her to take her life on this particular night. In doing so, she opens a window on the nature of suicide itself, our own reactions and responses to it—especially the impact a suicide has on those who remain behind.

Combining Kim’s diaries with family history and memoir, drawing on the works of doctors and psychologists as well as writers from Melville and Dickinson to Sylvia Plath and Wallace Stevens, Bialosky gives us a stunning exploration of human fragility and strength. She juxtaposes the story of Kim’s death with the challenges of becoming a mother and her own exuberant experience of raising a son. This is a book that explores all aspects of our familial relationships—between mothers and sons, fathers and daughters—but particularly the tender and enduring bonds between sisters.

History of a Suicide brings a crucial and all too rarely discussed subject out of the shadows, and in doing so gives readers the courage to face their own losses, no matter what those may be. This searing and compassionate work reminds us of the preciousness of life and of the ways in which those we love are inextricably bound to us.

My Review:
This is a true story and based on the research and diary journals the author, Jill Bialosky, has compiled together.  In doing this, she hopes to have a better understanding to the events that led to the suicide of her younger sister, Kim.  Most of all, it is an opportunity to bring closure from her sister’s  death that was not only untimely, but unexpected.  This story weaves diary entries, along with police records, interviews of family and friends, and Jill’s personal recollections of her sister’s life.
This book is by no means a “how to” book, rather it sheds light into the impact suicide has to survivor’s.  The series of losses both sisters experience is tragic and shows how differently they both coped.  Not minimizing Kim’s life story, Jill Bialosky shares her own struggles and bouts of depression.  This also is a way for Jill to not only honor her sister through telling her story, but it also shows that despite the finality of death, the soul and spirit live.
It is a book I would recommend to those working with suicidal clients and families, as well as those affected by suicide.  This is also a great book for those who love memoirs. While this book does deal with serious subject mater, there are moments where both sisters experienced some great memories.
*If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out to someone.  You are not alone and suicide is NEVER the answer.  Contact the Suicide Hotline, talk to a family therapist, and/or meet with your pastor or spiritual leader.
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Apr15

Review: Ghellow Road by T.H. Waters

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  • Title:  Ghellow Road
  • Publisher: Verefor Publishing Company LLC (October 14, 2010)
  • Published:  April 6, 2011
  • ISBN-10: 0982893116
  • ISBN-13: 978-0982893111

For a synopsis, please click here.

For an excerpt, please visit Verefor Publishing Company, LLC.

My Review:

This a true story about how mental illness affects not just the patient, but the whole family.  Spanning approximately 10 years of Theresa’s life, the reader gets a glimpse into her family and how she experienced them.  Being the youngest of 2, Theresa (lovingly nicknamed “Twink” by dad and “Ther” by friends), brings the reader through her early childhood and teen years.  The book is written in two parts: “Living in the Shadow of the Invisibles” and “Fumbling Through the Tangled Labyrinth”.  With no chapters to designate a beginning and end, it is quite symbolic to the chaos and constant changes she lives through.  Theresa bravely uncovers many deep hidden secrets and family dynamics that even her extended family and closest friends were not privy to.  With one of her earliest recollections of her mother talking to the “Invisibles”, and seeing a disturbing message written on the bedroom window, it becomes one of many psychotic episodes her mother experiences.  Without truly understanding what is happening, 8 year old Theresa simply sees her mother home one day, gone the next, and with her grandmother coming to care for her and her older brother, Mikie.  While not much background is given on Theresa’s father, it is clear that despite the loneliness and isolation he experiences, the depths of despair are much deeper and his sense of hopelessness is far greater than his capacity to cope and recover.  Mikie is the lost child, who eventually leaves home without truly addressing the issues he has with his mother and father.  This is a story that goes beyond having a schizophrenic mother and focuses on the children who are forced to figure out what what is going on, family dynamics, and relationships lost.

Writing this book, Theresa is able to let go of those “Invisibles” that truly permeated every part of her life and family home.  It is about her finding her voice, trying to make sense of the choices her family makes, and learning to find that “twinkle” in her future and relationships.  Her father had given her a Polaroid camera with a note attached, “so that you will always remember…” (p.94).  I have a feeling that her father would be proud of Theresa knowing that she did remember to capture some of those heartfelt and happy moments that can often be lost when mental illness lives in your home.

  I would suggest this book to those who work in the mental health profession, those who have been impacted by someone with a mental illness, and those who enjoy reading memoirs.  While there are dark moments in this book, the strong and resilient child perseveres and finds hope and meaning in her own life.

What I liked:  reading how mental illness affects the family through a child’ s perspective, the sweet memories with her father, the connections she makes with friends and others

What I would have liked:  background on father (did he have a mental illness?), relationship between Mikie and Theresa developed, a little more information on what happened to Mikie, the relationship between mom and Theresa-what happened after high school?, did the family receive counseling after the tragic incident in the beginning of the book? , relationship between Theresa and Grandmother (Dad’s mom)…what happened to her?

Style of Writing: 4/5

Pace of Story: 3/5

Storyline/Plot: 4/5

Character Development: 3/5

Christian Perspective: 0/5

Spiritual Connection: 1/5

Emotional Connection: 4/5

Moral/Message: 3/5



*Please note: this book was provided by T.H. Waters in exchange for an honest review.  No monetary or other forms of contribution were provided.

Apr10

Review: All That is Bitter and Sweet by Ashley Judd

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For a synopsis of this book, please visit Barnes & Nobles.

My Review:

I was immediately drawn to buy Ashley’s book when it first became available.  Growing up listening to The Judd’s music, and seeing Naomi and Wynona on talk shows lately (sans Ashley) to promote their new OWN show, I was intrigued to read Ashley’s story.  Ashley begins her journey reflecting on her own childhood issues of abandonment, rejection, depression, isolation, loss of family connection, and sexual abuse.  While she talks about these issues very openly, Ashley is not screaming “I am a victim” or “Naomi is a horrible mother”.  Rather, she reveals very openly how those issues affected her and what she did to move past it.

I love the language Ashley uses in describing her family:  family of origin and family of choice.  Even though her family of origin hasn’t always been the most supportive or understanding to her, she has learned to accept them as they are.  However, she also knows that she deserves love and connection and surrounds herself with those she has chosen to be in her inner circle of family.  One example is Tennie-director of Shades of Hope, her surrogate grandmother, who is always there for her and loves giving Ashley hugs.  As I read her experiences as a child growing up with a star-driven mother, I could sense her sadness and the confusion she felt about her father.  Growing up, Naomi told Ashley negative things about him, yet leaves her with him so that she and “Sister” (Wynonna) can travel across the country with their music.  Faced with episodes of severe depression, Ashley decides to receive help and enters into a rehabilitation program at Shades of Hope.  Today, Ashley has a wonderful relationship with her father and step-mother.  She also had a relationship with her mother and sister, albeit, it is not as close.

As an accomplished actress and intelligent college graduate, Ashley simply felt disconnected from her family and felt as if something was missing her in life.  It isn’t until she becomes an advocate for PSI that she begins to grieve as she realizes that she is not any different from the orphans she meets.  She shares the same kind of pain (regardless of what caused it) and felt alone growing up (as they also did with no family).  As she meets each child and woman on her trips (as Ambassador for PSI), she slowly begins her journey towards inner healing, spiritual connection with God, and learns the art of forgiveness.

She promises those she meets on her trips to not forget them and to be their voice to those in the United States and leaders of their countries.  While Ashley details every experience very clearly and lets you meet some of the people she has met along the way, you realize that through her own story, she uses this book as a tool to let their voices be heard.  She brings the reader into some very dark areas that she visits, such as brothels, the dirty streets where prostitution is rampant, and some of the poorest huts/tents.  Yet, in those darkest places, she finds beauty in the people she meets.  She hugs and nurtures those who are shunned from family and society: the orphaned, HIV positive children and women, and prostitutes.

Ashley shares the high and low points of her work as Ambassador and shares her inner struggles with religion and God.  She is very raw in this book and is as transparent as she can be, without losing focus of the work she continues to do for PSI.  Her journey takes her to a place of peace, acceptance, and a stronger will to continue helping those less fortunate to have a voice.

Ashley’s book cannot be read without wanting to do something and help others.  At the end of the book, Ashley provides websites and information to many organizations and programs that always need funding and volunteers (at any level).  This is a book that deserves to be read, if not for Ashley’s own journey, but for the women and children whose voices deserve to be heard.

Things I loved: being completely open with her thoughts and struggles, her ability to overcome her own childhood trauma by helping others less fortunate, shedding light on humanitarian efforts in other countries, giving hope to everyone, loving so openly, and extensive websites and information to help motivate readers to help others.

Things I didn’t like: Absolutely nothing!  One thing I have noticed since the book has been released, are the criticisms of her book: 1.  blaming Naomi  2.  her opinion on rap musicians  3.  sexual abuse-why now, did her mother truly abandon her…etc.

Quite honestly, this truly disturbs me, because these critics are taking away from the overall beauty of this book.  This is Ashley’s story and it deserves to be told.  As a sexual abuse survivor, she learned to deny her feelings.  I am glad that she is using this opportunity to be a voice for those who don’t have one and not being intimidated by those who truly missed the message of the book!  It is my hope that seeing her share these intimate details of her life, that she will also give courage to countless others that are also sexual abuse survivors.

*Please note: While this is Ashley’s story, she doesn’t go into a lot of detail about her family history.  She does write about it, but it’s certainly not the main focus of her book.

Meaningful Quotes:

On her family:  “When I came into the world four years later, my families troubled and remarkable course had already been set in motion, powerfully shaped by my mother’s desperate teenage lie and the incredible energy she dedicated to protecting it” (p.24).

On family of origin and family of choice: “…I discovered we all belong to two families:  our family of choice and our family of origin.  My family of choice is a colorful assortment of surrogate grandparents, aunts, uncles, and friends who infuse me with love, belonging, and acceptance (p.  24).

PSI stance on sexual education: “They let everyone know they could be devout Christians at a sectarian college and still accept the A, the B, and the C of HIV prevention; abstinence, being faithful and delaying onset of sexuality, and correct and consistent condom use with every sexual act.  (Eventually I would add my own D: delay of sexual debut, especially important for girls who are so often preyed upon by older men)”  (p.87).

One woman she met with HIV: “One night Mary was trying to persuade a client to use a condom but instead he pulled a wrapped piece of candy from his pocket and jammed it into her mouth.  “Chew!” he ordered.  So she chewed the wrapped candy as he glared at her.  “See!” the client hissed.  “That’s what it’s like using a condom.”  And the he beat her to a pulp and raped her (p.88).

Why women prostitute: “Prostitution occurs in the absence of choices…All of these women sent money home.  Some prostituted women were aware of the risks they were running in the midst of an AIDS epidemic, but one told me, “I may be dead in a few years form contracting HIV/AIDS, but I don’t have food for tomorrow….My life is so miserable, I don’t want to use a condom.  I want to die” (p.100).

One lesson learned: “I could be God’s light, but I could not work out each person’s salvation.  I could not rescue each person.  I could not heal them.  Only God could” (p. 129).

Style of Writing: 5/5

Pace of Story: 3/5

Storyline/Plot: 5/5

Character Development: 4/5

Christian Perspective: 3/5

Spiritual Connection: 4/5

Emotional Connection: 4/5

Moral/Message: 5/5


Apr7

Review-Foster Child: Finding the Courage to Succeed by Dennis Harris

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For a synopsis of Foster Child, please visit Amazon.com

My Review:

When I first received this book, I was surprised by how small the book was.  However, do not let that fool you.  This is by no means a short story.  In fact, this is a recollection told in Dennis’ own words as he describes his childhood with an absentee mother and later the failed support of the foster care system.

Foster Child gives the reader a closer look at how a child with no support system can still rise above it all to be a loving father and husband, as well as move from selling and using drugs to getting a college education.    While in school, he meets his wife who not only loves him unconditionally, but gives him the courage to move forward and tell his story.  Being a foster child that suffered abuse, Dennis chooses to reach out to other foster children, who he later adopts.

What I most liked: the ability to learn from his past and help others with their future, message that the human spirit cannot be broken, and all children want to love and be loved.

What I would have liked: the author to share more about “how” these issues affected him psychologically/emotionally and less of just facts, more of the issues related to his foster children and if any of their issues triggered anything for him and if so, how he addressed it.

Style of Writing: 2/5

Pace of Story: 2/5

Storyline/Plot: 3/5

Character Development: 3/5

Emotional Connection: 2/5

Moral/Message: 4/5


*This book was provided by Dennis Harris in exchange for an honest review.  No monetary or other forms of compensation was given.